so i was in the maribrynong library the other day. minding my studios business. and there was a rather elderly fellow in the desk-cubicle-thing opposite me. and he started making rather odd noises. almost as if he were in pain. and then the desk started shaking. and then i realised. i'd been hit by the public mastubator. and i really had to use the bathroom. but i didn't want to have to walk past him and risk awkward i-know-what-you-did-five-minutes-ago eye contanct. but then he left. so it was all okay in the end. and i'll be honest, i did check on my way back from the bathroom the state he left the deckbicle in.